I´ve had choices!

I’ve had choices , since the day that I was born.
There were voices , that told me right from wrong.
If I had listened , no I wouldn’t be here today.
Livin’ and dyin’ , with the choices I’ve made.

I received news today of a young man, named Crist, being murdered on the island. Crist and I grew up next door to each other, while he and I were never really friends we were neighbors. I knew him quite well and am saddened by what has happened to him. My thoughts and prayers are with his family.

Hearing of Crist´s untimely passing made me think of the past. I remember very well one night hanging with a few boys at the corner of our neighborhood, the guys there that night were Jeremy, Alstan, Fredy, Edmond, Crist, Murphy, Leroy, and Natan(me). we were between 9 and 12 years old, it wasn´t a school night so this is usually the nights we were allowed to stay out. I cannot remember everything but I remember we were having a wrestling competition as boys usually do. little did we know or even think about the turns our lives would take.

Fast forward to today. Oh what a different picture. Jeremy, the fun loving clown of the group,  is currently unemployed and has problems with drugs and alcohol. Alstan ,the shy one, has been in and out of jail and also has a terrible drug addiction. Fredy got involved in the gangs was in and out of jail until he was found dead in the woods. Edmond ,the bully, got involved with the gangs managed to keep himself out of jail but ended up murdering a young men earlier this year and last I heard was in jail. Murphy got on some very heavy stuff ended up brained damaged, he was a drug addict and a thief until he was too found dead in the woods earlier this year. Leroy ,the rich kid, moved to the U.S last I heard he had joined the army or something like that. And Crist , the too cool for school one, well he got in trouble and was murdered this morning.

Yep, these were the kids I grew up with they had almost the same opportunities and upbringing as I did. how did we end up on such different paths? How did these boys end up all messed up in life, and I…. well a little less so. I was talking to my mother this morning about how Christ Freddy and Murphy were my next door neighbors, these were they kids ,my age, that lived in the houses around us in Coxen Hole and they are all dead. All three murdered, that thought is surreal to me!

I dot know what the answer is, why things happened as they did. But I thank God for the mind he gave me to seek out a different path, a better path! I am thankful for the people and the influences he brought into my life.I am thankful for my mother and the way she raised me.
I have truly had choices along the way, and I have made some bad ones and some good ones. I remember the first time someone offered me a cigarette I tried it, bent over nearly vomited and decided never to try it again. I remember my dad and brother laughing at me when I went to visit him because I would not drink alcohol. Yea thank God he didn´t raise me. This is not say that people who smoke cigarretes or drink alcohol are gonna end up this way, it’s that at the age this was offered to me it would have been a very bad choice for me!

I choose a couple years ago to come into the capital to enroll in a medical program, a choice I did not make likely, the capital is a dangerous place and coming here would mean giving up a lot. I am very poor and medical school is incredibly expensive so I knew raising the money to finish would be difficult at best. my mother is in her fifties and a single woman so not working for eight years would mean me not being able to help my mother for eight years, my girlfriend, my church family, my job, these were all very hard choices to make. would I even be successful? what if I failed the very first class?

Again I thank God for giving me the courage to make good choices. One of the things I am most looking forward to is being able to look young people in the face, young men like Crist and Murphy , and say to them there is a better way, hard work and determination does pay. Here is how I did it, let me tell you my story ! And let me tell you if you make good choices there is an army of people, Dr Nate being number one, that will stand behind you. I am thankful for Peggy Stranges Over at Clinica Esperanza , Mark and Dave Elmore over at SOL who supported my choice to come to medical school and helped open a way for that to happen even when they knew very little about me.

Eleanor Roosevelt said “in the long run we shape our lives and we shape ourselves. The process never ends until we die. And the choices we make are ultimately our own responsibility”

As most of you know I started my fundraising campaign for the following year of medical school in october with the goal of raising 1750 dollars to help cover the 7000 dollars needed to stay in medical school here in tegus.
Thanks to Generous donations from Karin Fehlauer, Janice Fehlauer, Caroline power, Averard D’Souza,Jess ica Pfeltz,Ma Barley, and Anna Boucher Moskowits  I have raised 1350 dollars for the next school year and step in this journey. I still need to raise 400 dollars to be able to come back next year and I need your help to do so.

If you would like to help me on this journey go on over tohttp://www.solsite.org and click the donate button today. I can not do this without your help. Please consider sharing my story with your friends via Facebook. I greatly appreciate any action taken to help me.

I proudly continue working hard to be a community doctor. I continue to dream of helping and healing people and with your help. Please go on over to SOL today and chip in to help get me accross the finish line.Make sure to type Natan Webster in the dedication line, and please make sure to share this post with your friends. Also remember that all donations made via SOL are tax deductible.

donate here now help me get over the finish line.

I am thankful to my mentors, friends, and supporters who continue to share my story with others.

Please feel free to contact me with any questions.

Will you be a part of this?

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Dear Friends and Family,
I write this post with excitement, great Joy and hope for the future, as I continue my journey into medical school. As most of you know with help from Miss Peggy Stranges and Sol foundation I applied to and passed the admission testing, making more than the minimum requirement to enter medical school in Honduras in the summer of 2011.

My road to medical school has been challenging at best, as few students in my situation have tried to gain access to medical programs and succeeded, and of those who succeed to get in even fever actually get thru the program. I was born in less than ideal circumstances and have had and uphill battle all the way constantly beating long odds to overcome the challenges of life. I am the oldest of four siblings, and while growing up very poor with a single mother who did and awesome job considering the circumstances, I truly am a product of my family and communities hard work and perseverance, there are so many people that have invested time and energy in my journey way long before they even knew I was headed to medical school, Like Ptolemy and Neysa Matthews, and Joelle Fehlauer who came down to Honduras to volunteer time in a christian school I attended,all of whom made and incredible impression on me at a time when I was really struggling, fighting battles they knew nothing about.

I worked for three years at the local hospital in roatan, it was here that I truly became  inspired me to dream big and go beyond the expectations of my neighborhood. I know that inequities exist, and my curiosity for healing and justice deppened. I have made it my personal mission to improve conditions that prevent others from having equal treatment and access to education and healthcare resources. I have made it my mission to ease human suffering I believe this is the reason I was born.

My friends and mentors have said that I am a trailblazer, that I have taken the road less traveled, and that in the face of insurmountable challenges , I have overcome the greatest of obstacles. The reality is that I have had much help to be where I am today, and at every step of the way, I have encountered and relied on the kindness of friends, neighbors, teachers, and mentors to teach me and guide me through the process.

Now once more I must rely on the kindness of others to help me through my next step in medical school. Because Honduras really does not offer formal financial aid programs, or student loans, especially for poor people in medical school who´s parent has no valuable assets . I must fundraise to cover my medical school expenses in order to see my dream of becoming a community doctor come true. While I worked to pay my own way through high school, I am unable to work as a medical student due to the high volume of classes and information I will be required to learn over the next few years. I receive a partial scholarship from the foundation for the advancement of people administered by SOL foundation. which comes under review each year. This agreements as most of you probably already know requires that I raise part of the funds I need from the community.

It takes about 7000 dollars per year for me to stay in the program. I have a formula thru which Sol and Rotary provide roughtly 75% of this which leaves me to raise 1750 dollars per year. I have done this the past two years online with help from many friends. Well it is October I am about done with this year and it is time to do it again friends. I will be meeting with rotary and Sol in December to determine plans for the next year and whether they will continue funding me or not. But how about we start to raise our share and exceed it by them. I got help raising funds for this year from so many of you. Tricia, Anna, Nicki, Jennifer,Mark, Roatan homes, Peggy, Dave  and so many others shared my story and helped me raise the funds I needed for this year in about two weeks.

Friends, today I humbly ask you to dream with me. I am asking you to once again support my goal of becoming a physician by helping sponsor another year of my medical education, It would be impossible for me to do this without your help. My goal is to fundraise at least the 1750 dollars in order to help meet the 7000 dollars I will need for the next school year. . I am doing what I can in applying to scholarships, finding alternative measures of funding, and now asking for your support.

I know there are many other needs and I have seem so many request for money lately on Facebook for so many good causes, I also know that while we would like to help everyone there is only so much we can do. I have lamented how politicians are able to raise so much money from so many donors while many charities are lacking funding. But the truth is  one of the reasons they are able to do so is because a lot of people know about them.

Friend one of the best things you can do besides chipping in yourself is making sure to share this with your friends. I know there are many people who would be glad to help if they only knew about my dream and my story. After all, all I need is 1750 people to donate 1 dollar.

As I have mentioned before I am only able to continue on this journey because of the generous support of people like you, I would really appreciate it if you would go over to sol foundation website and make a donation of any amount to help me thru next year and to help me complete this program. I assure you I will honor that donation in loving service, and by making sure I am doing everything I can to pay it forward. Just make sure to type Natan Webster in the dedication box. Every penny sent to sol with the dedication line Natan Webster is administered to my scholarship Program, and is a foundational stone in helping me become a doctor with a message and a mission in Honduras.

http://www.solsite.org/

Cesar words resonate with my life goals of community work — “We cannot seek achievement for ourselves and forget about progress and prosperity for our community… Our ambitions must be broad enough to include the aspirations and needs of others, for their sakes and for our own.” I believe in the power we have as a community and hope that you can help me reach my dream of becoming a physician.
Thanks to the support of many I am about to finish and will soon be posting grades for macro-anatomy, neuro-anatomy,embryology,histology, and public health.

With your help next year, I’ll be able to finish physiology, bioquem, psychology, public health,microbiology, and genetics 

I proudly continue working hard to be a community doctor. I continue to dream of helping and healing people and with your help, I will be one step closer to creating a healthier, and more just world for all of us.
Please go on over to SOL today and chip in making sure to type Natan Webster in the dedication line, and please make sure to share this post with your friends. Also remember that all donations made via SOL are tax deductible.

donate here now

Please feel free to contact me with any questions.

Thank you!

A place called Hope.

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images (30)“Hope is the last thing you loose.” My mother would say this to me many times growing up, I often ,as many children do, did not listen very closely to the things my mother said, but now that I am out in the world trying to find my way it is the things that she taught me that have sustained and enable me to overcome every challenge I have faced. I remember one time I was in high school and had to quit because we could not afford the 50 dollars monthly that staying in school required. One afternoon I was out on the property where we lived and I was quite emotional, just crying and making a fuss, my mama came and found me and asked me what was the matter? I said “Mami it is not fair, I want to study so bad it is the only thing I want in life and I can’t do it, other people have the chance to study and they wasting it and me that want it so bad just can’t have it.” To which my mom replied “son never be envious of what other people have because you don’t know how they got it, and hope is the last thing you loose. We poor people all we have is hope if you loose that then you don’t have nothing.” Now I would like to tell you I got it and everything was ok, but being the child I was, I just keep fusing till my mom give me a good wipping and sent me to my room.  

My mom really did teach me to never loose hope not just by the things she said  but by the things she did and still does. My mom has quite a sad story she was abused as a child in horrible ways , she was given away by her mother, the stories she tells you just can’t make them up. But my mother is the most hopeful and happy person I have ever meet, If I had gone thru all the things she has, I doubt I would have a laughter left, but my mother laughs often and she laughs hard. And I realize that she is that way because she has never given up hope. She still hopes to buy a piece of land so she can leave for her four children, she still hopes she can help her big son become a doctor, she still hopes she want win the lotery, she still hopes and works to help those around her, after 50 years of trials, set backs, dissapoinments, and troubles she is still the happiest and most caring woman I know because she still hopes. 

Now as is usual around this time of year my scholarship is under review see I am on a partial scholarship which covers half of the cost involve with being in medical school in the capital. This scholarship comes under review in June-July for the scholarship year starting in August of each year. At which time the foundation providing this funding determines whether it will continue partially funding me for another school year.  The desition is based ,from what I am told, on the progress I am making toward getting my medical degree and the foundation’s financial situation. I was asked to turn in grades earlier this month and am waiting to hear from the foundation. I am asked to raise a half of my cost each year and thanks to generous donations from many kindhearted people I have done so for the year 2014, but without the funding from the foundation it would be impossible for me to stay in the medical program seeing as this accounts for roughly half of the money needed to stay in the program. So while I am keeping my hopes up and my fingers crossed, while waiting to hear from them, I would really desire those of you who know a word of prayer to pray for me please that this all works out. God has done it before and I know he can do it again. And those of you that don’t pray well wish me luck please! 

Being a doctor with a message of hope and change in my community is something that I badly want to do, it is what I believe my purpose is in life and is something I will continue to work hard for if given the chance. The medical program is extremely difficult, expensive, and long. Gosh 8 years is almost a decade and as many have said I am crazy to be doing it.Sure I admit it, I am somewhat crazy but I am also hopeful. It is hope that keeps me going because hope is all I’ve got. I wish I could work and be in med school as I did thru high school. I wish there was some student loan program at my disposal, I would be glad to graduate with student debt, it is better than not graduating at all. But because this is Honduras I must depend on kindhearted people to fund my education for such a long time and all I have to offer is hope and my good intentions, that is crazy indeed.

 But let me tell you about my dream job, there is a lady on the island by the name of Peggy Stranges,  I as many on the island call her Miss Peggy. She started a clinic literally in her kitchen just helping people who knew she is a nurse and would come to her for help, today Miss Peggy’s clinic is serving so many of Roatan’s most needy. The work she is doing is amazing and I want to be a part of it. Miss Peggy’s clinic is called clínica esperanza which is translated HOPE clinic. Miss Peggy now has maternity and pediatric services and is looking to expand to a surgical service. This clinic is run basically with volunteers from the U.S mostly. But how awesome it will be to have someone locally trained, locally raised volunteering in, dedicated and committed to the wellbeing of the clinic and the hundreds of people it serves. My dream is to become a doctor, to help those around me, and to help others fulfill their dreams just as you are helping me. Some days I go online and I look up pictures of the clinic and the work they do and  I am inspired, I am sharing some of those pictures in this post. I dream of becoming a part of the staff of hope clinic or and anywhere else I can help. I dream of working in a place called HOPE.

If you would like to help me make it you could take a little time to pray that I will receive funding for another year and you could also go over to https://donatenow.networkforgood.org/1441500 and make a donation of any amount now, remember that all donations via sol are tax deductible just make sure to type natan webster in the dedication line. Whether you donate, or pray, or share my blog with someone, or write me a quick  note, or just wish me luck. I appreciate any action taken and will make sure to update you all as soon as I hear from the foundation. Thanks. 

 

The first week!!!

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Several things have been made painfully obvious to me in my first week of medical school. First of all, it’s true – med students probably cover just as much in one week as general science students do in a month, the pace is ridiculous. Every day is a struggle to keep my head above water. We, as medical students, are expected to memorize a nauseating amount of information, and then regurgitate it on test day. Falling behind, even for a day, could be fatal. I study after I study and I still feel like I don’t study enough. Currently my schedule is as follows:

Monday-Friday

Classes:  9 to 5 it takes and hour for me to get to and from the faculty

Dinner : 6-7

Study: 7 my brain turns into cheese, usually around 11pm

Overall I study between 60-70 hours per week

 Second, This thing is ridiculously expensive, found out pretty early on in the week that I do not have enough money to cover books and lab material, and uniform cost, which means I have to figure something out by Monday.

Okay, enough about the sad/boring stuff. The faculty is awesome! It’s fun getting to school, reading the lecture topic for the day, thinking that “oh, I’ve studied a little of this before”, and then concluding the lecture with “I don’t remember EVER learning this before.” I have some of the most well-rounded classmates in the country, and we’re constantly pushing each other to learn everything we possibly can about the human body. The professors are awesome (and have a great sense of humor), the facilities are fantastic and the curriculum is solid! :-) I am surprised that my favorite class so far is by far neuroanatomy and histology is a close second. Anywho, here are two of my experiences that have made my week.

Story Number 1:

We had a faculty induction course on Thursday, by this point we had already meet all our professors received all our class plans and already had a bunch of assignments and books to buy. I went into the lecture at 7A.M feeling pretty down. One by the realization that I did not have nearly enough money to cover the cost of the things being required of me, and another by the sheer volume of stuff that was being heaped on us all at once. When I got there I had an immediate change of mood I saw so many people that I had taken different classes with the past 2 plus years at the university and while making small talk with different ones. I realized that we are all in this together, we are all going thru more or less the same thing and that most of us will survive, because that is our nature, we would not have gotten this far if it wasn’t. The course was a reminder to me of why I had chosen this difficult road and how my God will always put in my path the things that I need to get thru it. I came out of that course feeling reinvigorated and ready to go.

Story Number 2:

Friday afternoon I got out of embriology early and went to have lunch with some classmates and again I was feeling a little stressed out becuase of trying to figure out how to get my hands on all the material being required of me. Well I was deep in thought, thinking about coming up with the money to buy my disection kit. When my friend vicki says right out of the blue “You know it is amazing to me, I have known Natan for two plus year, we took our very first class together, and I have never seen him stressed, I mean even on test days the guy is just always relaxed and ready.” I was like which Natan are you talking about? Cause this Natan is freaking out right now.

After finishing lunch, we then went to histology. Like I said, I have surprisingly taken a liking to this class, Although for some reason the professor keeps calling on me, its like my name is the first name she learned so she just keeps going to it, which i don’t mind because it keeps me attentive and I am learning a lot. The subject we were doing today was really complicated and to me was so amazing. I came out of that class thinking about how much I love this career. I love the long classes, I love working with the cadaver and the microscope. I love all the amazing things I am learning about the greatest structure the world has ever known, the human body, and the many tools that help us study and take care of this body.
 
Medical school is hard and very stressful, But I am so glad that God and so may good people have given me this opportunity. I absolutely love it and am very excited about what all this semester will hold and all the things I will learn and hopefully, someday, being able to use that knowledge to help people. Yep its just the first week of faculty classes, it is hard and stressful and I love it.  And I thank you so much again for helping me be here. I would love to hear from you, how about leaving a quick note or sending me an email? or just passing my blog along to a friend so they can read it too.
Thank you for everything you do to help me. May God richly bless you.

Class schedule ready!!!

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I’ll go ahead and say it: last semester was pretty weird.  Frankly, I’m just glad it’s over.  I learned some valuable lessons, but they came with a heavy dose of hard knocks.

One bad semester won’t break me, though.  Today, a new dawn broke over my academic life.  A new semester has arrived, and I’m really excited about my new schedule.  Here’s an outline of the classes I’m taking, and what I hope to get out of them:

  • Macroscopic anatomy – Gross Anatomy or topographical anatomy: This is officially my first real medical class, no more introduction no more pre-med, this is the real deal.  I’m hoping to really understand the human body in general.  I have heard alot about this class the huge amount of material, the awful testing and of course working with corpses. Yep I am pumped and ready to dig in.Hopefully I wont be a fainter.
  • Neuroanatomy:I must say I am not as excited about this one. The human nervous system is very complicated and I suspect this class will be. Gonna have to hunker down and study. Already thinking about the all nighters I will be pulling for this one. Can’t wait!
  •  Embriology: The study of the development of an embryo from the fertilization of the ovum to the fetus stage. Got to get thru it, got to get thru it, that’s all I’m gonna say about that one. Lets just say gynecology and urology are not on my short list for specialties.
  • Microscopic Anatomy – Histology:  The study of the microscopic anatomy of cells and tissues. Looking forward to this one too. I am amazed at what an awesome structure the human body is and microscopic anatomy is an amazing testament and offers and amazing study of that structure and how it functions. As long as I don’t have to draw anything I’ll be happy.

Well, there it is ,four classes , 40 hours a week in class. 5A.M to 7P.M Monday to Friday. And still hoping to get one class in on Saturdays.  Now that I have some real, published goals, it’s time to work, well one more week of fun and then work! 

Thank you all for making this possible for me. Look for more updates on my progress!!!