A place called Hope.

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images (30)“Hope is the last thing you loose.” My mother would say this to me many times growing up, I often ,as many children do, did not listen very closely to the things my mother said, but now that I am out in the world trying to find my way it is the things that she taught me that have sustained and enable me to overcome every challenge I have faced. I remember one time I was in high school and had to quit because we could not afford the 50 dollars monthly that staying in school required. One afternoon I was out on the property where we lived and I was quite emotional, just crying and making a fuss, my mama came and found me and asked me what was the matter? I said “Mami it is not fair, I want to study so bad it is the only thing I want in life and I can’t do it, other people have the chance to study and they wasting it and me that want it so bad just can’t have it.” To which my mom replied “son never be envious of what other people have because you don’t know how they got it, and hope is the last thing you loose. We poor people all we have is hope if you loose that then you don’t have nothing.” Now I would like to tell you I got it and everything was ok, but being the child I was, I just keep fusing till my mom give me a good wipping and sent me to my room.  

My mom really did teach me to never loose hope not just by the things she said  but by the things she did and still does. My mom has quite a sad story she was abused as a child in horrible ways , she was given away by her mother, the stories she tells you just can’t make them up. But my mother is the most hopeful and happy person I have ever meet, If I had gone thru all the things she has, I doubt I would have a laughter left, but my mother laughs often and she laughs hard. And I realize that she is that way because she has never given up hope. She still hopes to buy a piece of land so she can leave for her four children, she still hopes she can help her big son become a doctor, she still hopes she want win the lotery, she still hopes and works to help those around her, after 50 years of trials, set backs, dissapoinments, and troubles she is still the happiest and most caring woman I know because she still hopes. 

Now as is usual around this time of year my scholarship is under review see I am on a partial scholarship which covers half of the cost involve with being in medical school in the capital. This scholarship comes under review in June-July for the scholarship year starting in August of each year. At which time the foundation providing this funding determines whether it will continue partially funding me for another school year.  The desition is based ,from what I am told, on the progress I am making toward getting my medical degree and the foundation’s financial situation. I was asked to turn in grades earlier this month and am waiting to hear from the foundation. I am asked to raise a half of my cost each year and thanks to generous donations from many kindhearted people I have done so for the year 2014, but without the funding from the foundation it would be impossible for me to stay in the medical program seeing as this accounts for roughly half of the money needed to stay in the program. So while I am keeping my hopes up and my fingers crossed, while waiting to hear from them, I would really desire those of you who know a word of prayer to pray for me please that this all works out. God has done it before and I know he can do it again. And those of you that don’t pray well wish me luck please! 

Being a doctor with a message of hope and change in my community is something that I badly want to do, it is what I believe my purpose is in life and is something I will continue to work hard for if given the chance. The medical program is extremely difficult, expensive, and long. Gosh 8 years is almost a decade and as many have said I am crazy to be doing it.Sure I admit it, I am somewhat crazy but I am also hopeful. It is hope that keeps me going because hope is all I’ve got. I wish I could work and be in med school as I did thru high school. I wish there was some student loan program at my disposal, I would be glad to graduate with student debt, it is better than not graduating at all. But because this is Honduras I must depend on kindhearted people to fund my education for such a long time and all I have to offer is hope and my good intentions, that is crazy indeed.

 But let me tell you about my dream job, there is a lady on the island by the name of Peggy Stranges,  I as many on the island call her Miss Peggy. She started a clinic literally in her kitchen just helping people who knew she is a nurse and would come to her for help, today Miss Peggy’s clinic is serving so many of Roatan’s most needy. The work she is doing is amazing and I want to be a part of it. Miss Peggy’s clinic is called clínica esperanza which is translated HOPE clinic. Miss Peggy now has maternity and pediatric services and is looking to expand to a surgical service. This clinic is run basically with volunteers from the U.S mostly. But how awesome it will be to have someone locally trained, locally raised volunteering in, dedicated and committed to the wellbeing of the clinic and the hundreds of people it serves. My dream is to become a doctor, to help those around me, and to help others fulfill their dreams just as you are helping me. Some days I go online and I look up pictures of the clinic and the work they do and  I am inspired, I am sharing some of those pictures in this post. I dream of becoming a part of the staff of hope clinic or and anywhere else I can help. I dream of working in a place called HOPE.

If you would like to help me make it you could take a little time to pray that I will receive funding for another year and you could also go over to https://donatenow.networkforgood.org/1441500 and make a donation of any amount now, remember that all donations via sol are tax deductible just make sure to type natan webster in the dedication line. Whether you donate, or pray, or share my blog with someone, or write me a quick  note, or just wish me luck. I appreciate any action taken and will make sure to update you all as soon as I hear from the foundation. Thanks. 

 

Class schedule ready!!!

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I’ll go ahead and say it: last semester was pretty weird.  Frankly, I’m just glad it’s over.  I learned some valuable lessons, but they came with a heavy dose of hard knocks.

One bad semester won’t break me, though.  Today, a new dawn broke over my academic life.  A new semester has arrived, and I’m really excited about my new schedule.  Here’s an outline of the classes I’m taking, and what I hope to get out of them:

  • Macroscopic anatomy – Gross Anatomy or topographical anatomy: This is officially my first real medical class, no more introduction no more pre-med, this is the real deal.  I’m hoping to really understand the human body in general.  I have heard alot about this class the huge amount of material, the awful testing and of course working with corpses. Yep I am pumped and ready to dig in.Hopefully I wont be a fainter.
  • Neuroanatomy:I must say I am not as excited about this one. The human nervous system is very complicated and I suspect this class will be. Gonna have to hunker down and study. Already thinking about the all nighters I will be pulling for this one. Can’t wait!
  •  Embriology: The study of the development of an embryo from the fertilization of the ovum to the fetus stage. Got to get thru it, got to get thru it, that’s all I’m gonna say about that one. Lets just say gynecology and urology are not on my short list for specialties.
  • Microscopic Anatomy – Histology:  The study of the microscopic anatomy of cells and tissues. Looking forward to this one too. I am amazed at what an awesome structure the human body is and microscopic anatomy is an amazing testament and offers and amazing study of that structure and how it functions. As long as I don’t have to draw anything I’ll be happy.

Well, there it is ,four classes , 40 hours a week in class. 5A.M to 7P.M Monday to Friday. And still hoping to get one class in on Saturdays.  Now that I have some real, published goals, it’s time to work, well one more week of fun and then work! 

Thank you all for making this possible for me. Look for more updates on my progress!!!

I have a dream!!!

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Haha there is a lofty tittle!!!

I do not claim to be anything like MLK, his spirit and amazing oratory skill is something I will never have.This is not a post about civil rights or MLK´s legacy , even tho I am a part of that legacy.
From what I´ve read about the march on Washington and MLK´s famous ¨I Have a Dream¨  speech, it was not the exact speech MLK had carefully prepared for the occasion, but as he got near the end of his prepared speech, Mahalia Jackson cried out ¨Tell them about the dream, Martin!¨ 

And today I want to tell you a little bit about my dream or myself from a different perspective. See in my last post I told you a little bit about myself about where I come from, and why I consider everyday I have a gift. About some of the adversities I´ve faced even as a baby, and the principles that guide my journey. How my mother taught me to work hard and dream big. I would like to share with you in this post where I´m headed, and share with you a little bit of my dream. 

A little over a month before I moved over to Tegus, my aunt Mavis, the sweetest little lady you´ll ever meet, fell ill and was interned in the Roatan public hospital, my aunt had struggled with heart problems and had been interned in the hospital several times and would always recover, but this time it was not so. I remember looking into my aunt´s face as she took her last breath and watching as the Dr tried to resuscitate her (I was allowed to do this because I worked there) , and thinking about what I was signing up for. Did I really want to become a doctor?
About three weeks later and less than a month before I was scheduled to start, I came to the hospital for work, and found my sister crying near the entrance, I tried to find out what happened but she could not talk, someone else told my sister (half sister on my father’s side) had a heart attack and had died. I ran into the morgue and saw her body, I could not believe this had happened and was overtaken with grief( she was younger than I am). See I hardly knew her, we grew up in separate homes and I have very little communication with my father´s family. that´s a long story and hard to explain.
Anyway, I touched my sister´s face and she was still warm. Her mother lives in puerto castilla and I and some of my family took her body over to puerto castilla for burial. We rode in a car with her casket for 5 hours. I keep thinking do I really want to be a doctor?

When we got there it was amazing the streets were covered with people, so much people! They kept trying to touch the casket as we passed by and hugging us and stuff, everybody kept coming up and talking to me at her wake because they had not meet me before, They were telling me all these stories about how my sister was so loved, and the many little things she had done for so many in that little town. As I listened I kept thinking, I did not know this person at all and she was my sister!!! All these people had all these stories, she had touched so many lives in the little time she had here. I did not know her! I did not have any stories!  That made it even harder to deal with.

I remember one of my pastors asking me a while back ,¨what is your plan? where do you see your life in five years from now?¨ That question keeps coming back to me a lot as I go along.

I want to touch as many lives as possible folks, I want to be a positive influence in the lives of all I meet. I want to change the World.
When my story is told I do not want it to be a rags to riches story, I do not want it to be about this baby that was born in the worse of circumstances and came up to have a lot. That is not my dream, not that I have anything against that, in fact I admire the people that have those stories.
My mother always told me it is better to give than to receive, and to work that I might have to give to those that need. I was not raised nor came into this world to be a taker, while at this point in my life I am definitely a taker, I look forward and dream of the day when I will become a giver, it is what drives me to keep going.

I dream of the day I will graduate and once again become a productive member of society. I look forward to working with patients , I look forward to the day I can use the skills I am learning, to ease human suffering. I look forward to being able to contribute back into Sol foundation, especially their scholarship program. I dream of the day I will be able to fully assist in Sol´s projects here on the Island. I look forward to the day I will be able to contribute to the Rotary club of Roatan and hopefully become a Rotarian. I dream of the day I will be able to help my mom and sisters. I dream of the day I will become a giver!!!
That is my dream to help people, to help the sick, the needy, the poor, to give time ,skills and money to making my community and the world a better place. I want to help other students and young people not have to go thru the many difficulties I´ve had to.  I look forward to making sure ( my kids if I have any) have a father, a good father, not at all like the one I have.
When my journey is done be it a year from now or 60 years from now, my heavenly father and all those that know me can look on and say WELL DONE. 
I dream of positively changing the world of all those I come into contact with, and starting a ripple effect that will go on for a long time after I am gone. This is a long journey, becoming a doctor is a long and difficult process. But, I believe this is my calling and the best way I can serve both God and man, And I appreciate all the support I am getting from Rotary, Sol Foundation, and all of you.
Can you Imagine the day I get to maybe help some of my donors, that will be a very good day indeed. For me at least! not so much for them, because they will have to be sick for that to happen right?

As I read this I know it sounds very cliche, but friends that really is my dream.

As you know I’ve started a fundraising campaign to help cover cost for next year, there is no way I could do this without your help. I am looking to raise 1500 dollars for next year. Class starts on January 23 so I have about four weeks to do this. I would really appreciate it if you would click on the link below and go over to Sol Foundation and make a donation of any amount, to help me reach my goal, remember all donations are fully tax deductible. Make sure to type Natan Webster in the dedication line. Also consider sending me an email, commenting, following my blog, or sharing this with your friends, help me get the word out and follow my long journey, I need you. I have a dream and I want you to be a part of it.

https://donatenow.networkforgood.org/1441500

 

I wish you all a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. May God richly bless you and cause his face to shine on you.

Thank you for all your support.

 

“The life of a man consist not in seeing visions and in dreaming dreams, but in active charity and in willing service”- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow